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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25433578">Alone Together</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Up_sideand_down/pseuds/Up_sideand_down'>Up_sideand_down</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Compilation of Final Fantasy VII</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Fluff and Angst, M/M, Mind Meld, Sharing a Body, Unethical Experimentation</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 06:42:42</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>5,706</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25433578</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Up_sideand_down/pseuds/Up_sideand_down</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Sephiroth and Cloud have a problem: They need to get apart even if they want to stay together.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Sephiroth/Cloud Strife</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>142</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>FF7 Fanworks Exchange '20</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Alone Together</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/sephcounttheways/gifts">sephcounttheways</a>.</li>



    </ul><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>So I still haven't seen Venom, even though I want to, but this prompt seemed hecka fun...and then I just made it all fluffy and angsty and sweet. Hope you like it Sephcounttheways!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> When Zack saw Cloud again for the first time in what felt like months he had to stop himself from pouncing. Half a second later, he felt relieved he hadn’t jumped on Cloud. Cloud…did not look okay. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Spike?” Zack asked softly. Cloud jumped at the sound of his voice. He had heavy bags under his eyes which were even more unsettling with the soft glow his eyes had. And why was he so jumpy in a locker room?</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Oh Zack,” Cloud said, “you scared me.” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Is everything…okay?” Zack asked, “you look beat.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Oh,” Cloud sighed, “yeah. Yeah, I’m fine. I’ve had sleeping troubles since my first mako shower…everything is so loud.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Why haven’t you called me,” Zack asked, “I got good ear plugs and stuff. I would have been happy to help you transition. I haven’t really seen you since we got burgers after you got in.” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I’m just busy,” Cloud said with a lazy wave, “They’ve got me going everywhere all the time. Non-stop, you know?” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Then you should say no,” Zack said, “Everyone takes breaks. Even Sephiroth.” Cloud barked out a laugh at that. Then tried to cover it with a cough. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Okay maybe not Sephiroth,” Zack conceded, “but if you need me to go up to bat for you…lemme know okay. I was really worried about how you were doing. It’s been six months since you even texted me.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Oh gosh has it really,” Cloud said with a yawn, digging around for his PHS. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “You’re lucky you’re adorable,” Zack said, with one good natured swipe at his hair, “and don’t be a stranger. I was looking forward to being a SOLDIER <em>with</em> you.” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I’ll try,” Cloud said. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Are you doing anything tonight?” Zack asked. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I don’t think so,” Cloud said yawning again. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “How about I buy you some chow and help you figure out how to get a day or two off?” Zack said. Cloud blinked for a moment. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Sure,” he said with ashrug, “it’s worth a shot.” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Alright Spikey!” Zack said, “lemme rinse off and we’ll go.” Cloud nodded, wiping at his face. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “You can get a power nap while you’re waiting,” Zack whispered. That got a soft smile. Zack was starting to feel better after his shower…but when he stepped out…</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Sephiroth?” Zack said, “Where’s Cloud?” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> Commander Sephiroth stretched once, getting a decent crack out of it. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Who?” Sephiroth asked. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Uh…new SOLDIER,” Zack said, “average height…ferociously blonde…blue eyes. I told him to take a nap and wait for me…where’d he go?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “He left,” Sephiroth said simply. But something still wasn’t right. Sephiroth had those bags under his eyes…and weren’t his eyes…green? And slitted? And…not blue? </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Are you alright sir?” Zack asked. Sephiroth fixed him with a hard stare. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Why wouldn’t I be?” he said. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “You look tired,” Zack offered. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I’m not,” Sephiroth said. Zack decided there was no getting anything out of Sephiroth and backed down. Cloud left without him…hopefully to go take a nap in a more comfy place. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Well…I’ll catch up with Cloud later then,” Zack said, more to himself than Sephiroth, as he made for the door. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I’m sure you will,” Sephiroth said behind him anyway. </span>
</p><hr/><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “<em>He’s going to keep looking for me. You know that, right?”</em></span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> <em> “I know. I know. I just…panicked.”</em> </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> <em> “You…panicked?”</em> </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> <em> “You were tired.”</em> </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> <em> “I’m not tired. He’s tired. The naps I try to take aren’t working. You are just as tired as I was. Do you feel tired?”</em> </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> <em> “Yeah. What do I do?” </em> </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> <em> “I don’t know. Do you think you can sleep at all?”</em> </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> <em> “Maybe. What about Zack?”</em> </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> <em> “If he finds out he finds out. It’s getting out of our hands.”</em> </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> <em> “Are you sure? What if they…”</em> </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> <em> “I’m not going to let anything happen to Zack. Are you?”</em> </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> <em> “No.”</em> </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> <em> “Then he’ll be fine, Sephiroth. I’m more worried about us.”</em> </span>
</p><hr/><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> It took another week for Zack to catch up to Cloud. It was late at night once again. Actually so late that it was morning. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Cloudy…where have you been?” Zack said. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Oh…Hi Zack,” Cloud said, looking up from his PHS. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “‘Hi Zack?’” he said, “I’ve been chasing you up and down this building for a week and all I get is a ‘Hi Zack’. Where did you go? I was going to get you food. <em>Free food</em> Cloud.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “You were?” Cloud said, “Oh…well I’m sorry. I’ve been working nights and sleeping in the day really took it’s toll on me.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “You’re telling me. It looks like you haven’t slept in months,” Zack said. Cloud barked out another weird laugh. Zack didn’t get the joke if there was one. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Sorry,” Cloud said, “It’s been tough. I hear so much better, y’know? And…most other people are up and about in the day…I also apparently picked up sleepwalking-“</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “That’s a common thing with SOLDIERs,” Zack said, “do you need someone to watch you?” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “No, no!” Cloud said, “I have someone. I got it figured out there. So I’m sorry…I probably did fall asleep on you and then…walked out.” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “You just missed Sephiroth,” Zack said. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Glad I did,” Cloud did, “I don’t want my first impression on him to be sleepwalking SOLDIER.” Zack couldn’t stop himself, he put his hand on Cloud’s shoulder. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Are you really okay?” he asked. Cloud shrugged. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I’m sure I’ll get it figured out,” Cloud said, “but thanks for looking out for me. It…honestly it makes me feel a little better.” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Can I get you something to eat?” Zack offered. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Thanks, but I’m working,” Cloud said with a smile. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I can grab it to go,” Zack said, “there’s bound to be a waffle place that’s open.” Cloud shook his head. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Thanks, but maybe another day,” Cloud said. Zack nodded. He would have felt better about Cloud. He could have accepted Cloud was just having the normal SOLDIER growing pains. He could have bought the lie Cloud had told him</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> If it weren’t for what he saw in the 49th floor bathroom. He saw Cloud rinsing his hands, then splashing some water on his face, probably just got off and was getting ready to go home. Zack decided to leave him to it and just slipped into a stall without a word. He was going to visit Aerith and didn’t want to go up to his apartment to change. Bathroom stall was closest. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> But that’s when things got weird. Cloud kept making all these weird sighs, and sounded like he was adjusting all his belts. But he didn’t move from that sink. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> Then there was the fact that when Zack stepped out…Sephiroth was standing where Cloud definitely should have been. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> And there was the fact that Sephiroth still had Cloud’s blue eyes, and a blondish looking spike of hair among his long silvery tresses. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “What the everliving fuck,” Zack said. He certainly wasn’t seeing Aerith today, that was for sure. </span>
</p><hr/><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “This was Hojo’s doing,” Sephiroth confirmed, “with approval from the President. It was an attempt to make me more…limitless.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Did Cloud agree to this?” Zack asked. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “No,” Sephiroth said, “and neither did I.” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Okay,” Zack said, still trying to process.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Really…you’re talking to both Cloud and I, and neither of us at the same time,” Sephiroth said, “our actual bodies are still in the lab…but we’re both aware of what is happening. Cloud is here, and I am here…but we’re trapped in another body. I don’t know who.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Why?” Sephiroth shrugged. When his mouth opened, it was Cloud’s voice that came out. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Because Sephiroth needs to sleep,” Cloud said, “He needs time to rest. When he gets tired…I’m supposed to take over and keep working.” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “So you’re both like this…to make a more unstoppable killing machine…” Zack said. Cloud/Sephiroth nodded. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Did it…work?” Zack asked. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “At first,” Sephiroth said, “It…it took a while to adjust.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “There was a lot of screaming,” Cloud translated, “we really felt violated. We figured it out. We have a system in place…kind of.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “We tell each other when we’re taking over,” Sephiroth said. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “You can talk to each other?” Zack asked. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Yes,” it was really weird hearing two voices from one person. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “We kind of…know each other’s thoughts,” Cloud said, “there’s nothing secret or sacred between us. That was what most of the screaming was about. We just got used to it.” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “How long have you…been together,” Zack said. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Six months,” Sephiroth said. All of Cloud’s SOLDIER career, Zack realized. Cloud seemed to have picked up on it. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I went to the labs for my first mako infusion…and then I was like this,” Cloud confirmed. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I was just ordered down,” Sephiroth said, “but I was told just as much as Cloud.” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Are you guys…okay?” Zack asked. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “No,” Sephiroth said. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “It’s like we said…it worked at first. We had a system. We talked, we pushed through it. Sephiroth helped me figure out SOLDIER. I made sure when Seph came back things were ready for him. We worked round the clock and…internally, we’re not tired. We’re well rested and ready.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “But this body is not,” Sephiroth finished. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “It needs sleep?” Zack guessed drily, “I couldn’t tell with all the yawning and dark circles around your eyes.” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “We’re trying,” Cloud said, “I take cat naps whenever I can…but it’s not enough. Sephiroth even managed to get 4 or 5 hours of sleep in this week…but it wasn’t enough.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “We don’t know what will happen if…we fall apart,” Sephiroth said. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Why didn’t you tell anyone?” Zack asked. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Would you have believed us?” Sephiroth asked. Zack had to think. If either Cloud or Sephiroth had come to him with this story…and he hadn’t watched Cloud turn into Sephiroth…</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “No,” Zack said, “I wouldn’t have.”</span>
</p><hr/><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> Sephiroth sat in front of the tablet, fidgeting, waiting for the line to connect. Zack had texted an abridged version of the story, but Angeal and Genesis wanted to “see” for themselves. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I feel stupid for not telling anyone earlier,” was all Seph could say. But Zack couldn’t blame him. How on Gaia do you say that you’re sharing a body with another person’s consciousness? He was even halfway to stopping believing it. Sephiroth looked like Sephiroth…but Cloud was there somehow. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> Finally the connection settled. Angeal and Genesis looked back from inside a command tent. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Seph?” Angeal asked after a long pause. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Yes?” Sephiroth replied. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “You look terrible,” Genesis said. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Technically I haven’t slept in 6 months,” Sephiroth replied. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “So…can…he hear us?” Angeal asked. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “My name is Cloud, and yes I can.” Zack would never get used to hearing Cloud’s voice come out of Sephiroth’s mouth. Genesis and Angeal were very quiet for a long moment. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Shiva’s Tits,” Genesis finally breathed. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Can…can you turn into Cloud,” Angeal said. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “It will take a few minutes,” Sephrioth said. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Please, just to…cement this,” Angeal said. It wasn’t instantaneous, but it was quick. Somehow Sephiroth’s features slipped away until Cloud appeared. The hair was the most noticeable of course, Cloud had to brush some sliver hair away when it got too stubborn, but it all turned blonder and shorter. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Holy shit,” Genesis said. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Does it hurt?” Angeal asked. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Nah,” Cloud said, “It was really uncomfortable at first, but it’s fine now.” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Are you two…okay?” Genesis asked, “I mean…are you…getting along?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Now we are,” Cloud confirmed, “It was…it sucked at the start. We learned how to be friends. We had to.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Sephiroth?” Angeal asked. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Cloud said the truth,” Sephiroth said, “I have nothing to add.” If Zack wasn’t used to hearing Seph talk in Cloud’s voice then he most definitely wasn’t ready to hear Sephiroth’s voice coming out of Cloud. Angeal and Genesis looked just as stricken. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Look we weren’t trying to keep it a secret,” Cloud said, “we were just trying to not look batshit insane.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “We’re not mad,” Angeal said. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Not mad at you two,” Genesis corrected, “you are the <em>victims</em> here as far as I am concerned and you absolutely would sound insane if either of you tried to talk.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “But even if we were okay at one point, we are not okay now,” Cloud said, “I don’t know what’s going to happen to us…but we are falling apart, physically at least.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Mentally?” Zack asked. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “If Cloud wasn’t here, I wouldn’t be mentally okay,” Sephiroth’s voice said. Zack had to restrain himself from hugging Cloud. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “We have to separate,” Cloud said, “but we don’t know how.” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I do,” Genesis said, “you’re not gonna like it.” </span>
</p><hr/><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> Genesis and Angeal pulled in a favor from Lazard. The biggest one they had. Lazard lied flat out and said something was going horribly wrong with Sephiroth. Lazard never even laid eyes on the Cloud/Seph combo, he just made sure they got to the labs. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> Genesis was right. Cloud and Sephiroth hated the idea. They didn’t have a choice. Hojo put them in this position and all they could do was hope Hojo would get them out. Or watch them die. That was also an option. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> If Hojo was upset at all about being ordered to fix “Sephiroth” he didn’t show it. Sephiroth thought Hojo was particularly gleeful about it. He agreed that if the opportunity arose, Cloud could punch Hojo. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> It sadly did not. Hojo realized their sorry state fairly quickly. He was just as happy about their body falling apart as their “transitional success.” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “You are both suffering from severe sleep deprivation. The damage to the heart is irreparable. You will both have to revert to your original bodies,” Hojo informed them blithely. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “You don’t say,” Cloud said drily, then snorted (or…really it was Sephiroth who snorted). </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I’ll have the operation set up this afternoon,” Hojo said, taking vigorous notes. </span>
</p><hr/><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> They sat down in front of the mako tanks that held their real bodies. They looked fine, vitals were stable and all. They could have been sleeping. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “<em>I hope Hojo doesn’t fuck this up</em>,” Cloud said, “<em>I’m sure he won’t with you at least.</em>” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “<em>Don’t say that,” </em>Sephiroth said, <em>“Please don’t.” </em></span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"><em> “Sorry,” </em>Cloud said, “<em>I can’t stop myself from thinking it.”</em></span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"><em> “You deserve better,” </em>Sephiroth said, “<em>You’re a good person. I…I really meant it when I said I would have gone crazy if I wasn’t with you.”</em></span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> <em> “I know you did. I’m just scared.” </em> </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> <em> “I am too.”</em> </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"><em> “If I don’t get the chance later,” </em>Cloud said, <em>“I want you to know that I did think of you as my friend. You were very kind to me when you didn’t have to be.” </em></span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Sephiroth, we’re ready for you,” a lab tech called from the doorway. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “He has a name too,” Sephiroth said sharply, “it’s Cloud.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “<em>See you on the other side?” </em>Cloud asked softly. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “<em>I’d better,” </em>Sephiroth replied. </span>
</p><hr/><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> Sephiroth didn’t turn when he heard people behind him. Cloud wasn’t awake yet. He didn’t like that. The last thing he remembered was laying down. Cloud was quiet, but he was there. And then he woke up and…Cloud was gone. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> He didn’t know how to feel. He knew he was supposed to feel relief that he was all alone and back to himself. But he didn’t know if he should feel a bit lonely too. He’d spent six months sharing headspace with Cloud. It was never quiet and he was always aware that Cloud was there. There was never really a dull moment…but it hadn’t been awful either. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Seph?” he relaxed, realizing it wasn’t some lab tech or Hojo. He looked at Zack. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Are you…okay?” Zack asked. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I’m fine,” Sephiroth said, “and it’s just me.” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I overheard Hojo saying you’re both back in yourselves,” Zack said, “Cloud just needs more time to sleep off the mako.” Sephiroth nodded, feeling more relief. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Do you know…what’s going to happen to Cloud?” Zack asked. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “He <em>should</em> be in SOLDIER,” Sephiroth said, “Even if he didn’t know half the things he does from…from living in my head…” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I think that’s the problem,” Zack said, “He knows too much…from being in your head.” Sephiroth felt a newer stone form in his gut…but this one was less lead and more molten lava. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Can you watch over him?” Sephiroth asked. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Where are you going?” Zack asked. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “To make death threats,” Sephiroth said. </span>
</p><hr/><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> Cloud woke up feeling very groggy and very hungry…and very quiet. It was way too quiet now. Even with people trying to chatter over him and get him to sign this and that and ask him all sorts of questions. He didn’t have Sephiroth’s voice telling him what to expect and what was going on. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> Cloud didn’t like that. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> Things were moving fast and Cloud had to read so much more things because Sephiroth wasn’t there to summarize…but he got the gist: He was a SOLDIER 2nd Class now…and he was alone, and he wasn’t allowed to talk about what happened those 6 months with anyone. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> He was really, really alone. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> He learned later that he had been selected by Hojo due to some sort of mako test that indicated he and Sephiroth might “meld”. His acceptance into SOLDIER hadn’t been a total lie…but there was some serious fudging. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> He learned later that Sephiroth went to the top of ShinRa tower with a list of things he was planning to do if Cloud was at all harmed, threatened, or erased for his part in his experiment. He didn’t know all the things on the list, but he knew there was a lot of fire involved and a Leviathan summon to break the whole tower in half. Cloud was a little sad he wouldn’t get to see Sephiroth actually do those things, but overall being alive was also good. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> But the first thing Cloud learned after waking up alone in his own head and body…was how crushingly lonely that first night alone really was. </span>
</p><hr/><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> Cloud was different. Not in the lost-the-twinkle-in-his-eye sort of way. Cloud never had a hopeful twinkle in his eye. He had been rather pessimistic <em>before</em> he’d was shoved in the same body as Sephiroth. Cloud called it realistic, Zack thought he just needed to see the glass as maybe 1/3 full from time to time. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> But he was different. He had been a stubborn loner before, had major issues making friends naturally and seemed content to just be alone.Cloud was still stubborn, but now he threw himself at his fellow SOLDIERs, determined to make some sort of friend. Someone was going to talk to him, he would make it happen…and it did. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> But he was still sadder than before. He could be in the middle of hearing someone’s fantastic story about being on a mission…and his face would just fall for a moment before picking itself back up. Zack had a nagging suspicion that it wasn’t just about the way he got into SOLDIER. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> He knew for sure when Cloud was being sent out to Cosmo Canyon what the problem was. It was the first time Cloud had met Sephiroth since…</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> And Cloud wasn’t star-struck, he wasn’t being a fanboy. He looked…just lost. </span>
</p><hr/><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> Externally, Sephiroth looked like he was adjusting well. He was actually doing better than before. But Sephiroth didn’t take any credit for that. Cloud, despite being a moody, stubborn, pessimistic, and sarcastic sort of person, was still more emotionally well-adjusted than Sephiroth could ever hope to be. Cloud was more or less a good role model for Sephiroth, someone to copy and figure out how to appear more human than he was. Sephiroth was still copying Cloud. He cooked for himself, tidied instead of deep-cleaned, had some extra knick-knacks besides his sword. He even used <em>idioms</em>. Hojo would have heart palpitations if he knew. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> But that was all external. Internally…there was an empty void that just echoed his own thoughts back. He was dealing with it the same way he’d dealt with having Cloud there all the time: he tried to ignore it. Tried to go about things as usual. It rarely ever worked, but he didn’t have another solution. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> But that was best thing about Cloud. He was a stubborn, pessimistic, sarcastic asshole; he forced Sephiroth to deal with him, to answer his questions, to talk to him. Cloud would not go quietly into that good night…and Sephiroth would be eternally grateful for that. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> More than stubborn…Cloud was kind. He wasn’t great with people either, but he tried. He tried so hard. He wanted to look cool and aloof, but he was not. More than once Sephiroth took over their body to find Cloud had packed him lunch, or organized his day to make it more streamlined, or pre-booked time in the V.R. Room because he knew the day would be stressful and he might just want to…play. Sephiroth had not been exaggerating when he said if it hadn’t been Cloud he would have gone insane. Cloud made him face reality, but reminded him they were in this together, for better or worse. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> He’d learned to rely a little on Cloud. As Cloud said, “I can’t really go away, so I might as well make it work.” But now Cloud was gone. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> And Seph had to rely on himself again. And he went back to what he knew. He ignored that great void he had now. He dove back into work while trying to make up for all those little things Cloud did. He was thinking going out of Midgar would be good. He hadn’t heard of a SOLDIER with the last name Strife before. It might be good to go out with a group. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> It was only when he saw the face he’d seen in a mirror hundreds of times before that he realized he’d made a great error. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> Why oh why had he never learned Cloud’s last name? </span>
</p><hr/><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “SOLDIER 2nd Class Strife?<em>”</em></span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"><em> “</em>Yes Sir?” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I…uh…I never realized.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “It’s alright I never really thought about my last name either.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I…I’m not sure I can be impartial-“</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I can request a different assignment.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “No Cloud! I mean…you were assigned here first. I will select another.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “It’s not a huge deal. It’s just to Cosmo Canyon and back.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I do not want to make this a huge deal. I will select another assignment.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Okay Sephiroth.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “That was the most awkward conversation I’ve ever seen,” Zack told Cloud. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Yep,” Cloud said, then got on the transport. </span>
</p><hr/><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> Sephiroth didn’t take another assignment. He went home. He went alone. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> Cloud went to on his mission. He smiled and laughed and talked with the other guys he was sent out with. He didn’t smile or laugh when he went to the bathroom alone. He stood in front of a mirror and willed his hands to stop shaking. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> Neither man expected company, but it came anyway. </span>
</p><hr/><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> Sephiroth was making scrambled eggs. It had become a weird comfort food, mostly because Cloud had some rhythmic thought when he made them. It wasn’t quite a song or a chant, but he thought it when he made eggs. Sephiroth just kept repeating it. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> He nearly spilled the pan when his door shut. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I told you to change your lock,” Genesis said simply. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “How did you get back?” Sephiroth said, “I thought you were supposed to be in Mideel indefinitely.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I said, ‘I’m going to Midgar see you in two days,’” Genesis said, “No one stopped me.”Sephiroth just accepted it. It certainly sounded like Genesis. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “You learned to cook,” Genesis said, sounding surprised. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Only what Cloud knows how to cook,” Sephiroth replied, now that his eggs were done…he wasn’t really hungry. He scraped them onto a plate, pushed it towards Genesis. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “How is Cloud?” Genesis asked. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “He’s…fine,” Sephiroth said. Genesis looked at him hard for a moment. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “You haven’t talked to him,” Genesis said at last. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I talked to him today,” Sephiroth offered. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “What did you say?” Genesis said, his eyes too innocent.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “That…I’d take myself off the mission roster,” Sephiroth said. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “So you said you’d continue to avoid him,” Genesis said, picking up the fork and starting to eat, “Oh fuck, Cloud makes good eggs.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “We spent six months…trapped together,” Sephiroth said, “He should want to get away from me.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “That’s not what I saw,” Genesis said through another bite, “I’m sure what you both went through was hell…but you weren’t at each others figurative throats. You seemed like you both got along pretty well.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “We did,” Sephiroth said. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “You seemed damn friendly too,” Genesis added. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “We were,” Sephiroth said. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Were you friends?” Genesis asked. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I thought so,” Sephiroth confirmed. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “So why are you avoiding him?” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Because…because,” Sephiroth faltered, he hadn’t said so since they were separated, but denying hadn’t made it go away. It made is worse. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I miss him,” Sephiroth said. Genesis stopped eating. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I miss him,” Sephiroth repeated, “I miss all the little things he would do for me, without even asking. I miss just watching him in control, I miss all the mean comments he’d make to me and only me. He made me laugh more than anyone else, not the polite little ones I fake. He made me laugh all the time. I miss just knowing he was there.” Genesis set down his fork. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Sephiroth,” he said softly, “what you’re feeling…it’s a completely normal thing to feel.” Sephiroth didn’t say anything, just looked away, letting his hair make a curtain between him and Genesis. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “You two went through something pretty terrible, but from what I understand, you made the best of it. You became pretty close friends, “Genesis said, “That’s a normal thing.” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I suppose,” Sephiroth said. Genesis scoffed a bit at Sephiroth’s non-reaction. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Alright,” he tried again, “have you considered that you and Cloud got along not just because you were trapped together, but because there was some sort of personality chemistry there.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Not…really,” Sephiroth admitted. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Well maybe there was,” Genesis said, “maybe you don’t just miss being alone together with Cloud all the time. Maybe you miss your friend.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “But…I can’t imagine being around me…and just forgetting about the worst experience of Cloud’s life,” Sephiroth said, “Wouldn’t it just be better to just…wait this out? Wait for him to forget.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Cloud is not forgetting what happened to him,” Genesis said, “just like I won’t forget what happened to me, and all the terrible things I tried to do. It’s permanent. But how can you be sure that Cloud doesn’t also miss you unless you ask him?” Sephiroth glanced over at Genesis through where his bangs hung in front of his face. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “You can’t,” Genesis answered, “I’m telling you right now, it’s okay to miss Cloud. It’s okay to miss your friend. It’s okay to try and protect him from pain and harm, but it’s also okay to tell Cloud that you miss him. It’s okay to be friends now that you’re apart.” Genesis pushed the plate of eggs back towards Sephiroth. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “It’s okay to talk to Cloud, Seph,” Genesis said. </span>
</p><hr/><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> Zack knocked before he went into Cloud’s room. Cloud didn’t move from where he was sitting on the inn bed. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Cloud,” Zack said, “Cloud, what’s happening man?” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Nothing,” Cloud said, “It’s fine, I’m just tired."</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “You gave me that excuse once and I’m never buying it again,” Zack told him. Cloud didn’t turn around, but he looked down at the floor. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I go back and forth,” Cloud said, “I wish that none of it ever happened…and then I wish that I was still with him.” Zack sat next to him. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I miss him,” Cloud admitted, “This sucks and I can’t even talk to anyone about it. I miss my friend.” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I knew there had to be good parts,” Zack said. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Most of it was good to be honest,” Cloud said, “Sephiroth…he was strange, but he’s not cruel. Not on purpose. He was nice to me. He protected me from a lot bureaucratic bullshit at the start…and then we just talked all the time. Even over just stupid shit. I could just reach out…and he’d be there and he never ever let me think that what I needed was ridiculous or needy. I relied on him a lot.” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “You two got close,” Zack stated, “you said as much. Do you think of him as a friend?” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Yeah,” Cloud said, “And I know he walked away because he didn’t want to hurt me…but I don’t know how to tell him.” Zack put a hand on Cloud’s shoulder. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Tell him what you told me,” Zack told him. </span>
</p><hr/><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> Cloud stepped off the transport thinking he’d have a couple minutes to prepare something to say to Sephiroth, but Sephiroth was waiting in the vehicle bay. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> Cloud decided it was probably better this way, as he approached. He improvised a lot of things in the moment and not many things had exploded so far. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I’m sorry,” Sephiroth said first. It threw Cloud completely off guard. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Genesis surprised me with a visit…he was the first person to tell me sorry about what happened, I didn’t know if you had gotten one. So I’m sorry. I’m sorry that it happened to you. You didn’t deserve it. Hojo should have left you alone.” Cloud blinked, realizing Sephiroth really was the first person to give him a proper apology. He shouldn’t have been the first. Cloud felt better all the same. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Thanks,” Cloud said, it was almost a sigh it felt so relieving. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I’m sorry about…before,” Sephiroth said, “the Cosmo Canyon mission thing.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “No,” Cloud said, “I know, you were just trying to keep nice with me. You didn’t have to.” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I’m sorry anyway,” Sephiroth said. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Can we…can we talk somewhere else?” Cloud asked. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I was hoping you would ask.” </span>
</p><hr/><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> Cloud wrapped his arms around Sephiroth’s waist the instant the conference room door locked behind them. Sephiroth felt strange realizing it was the first time he or Cloud had ever physically touched each other. Sephiroth was not one who liked to be touched…but this felt like the best thing to do. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> He hugged Cloud back. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I missed you,” Cloud said, “I couldn’t sleep the first night because I was just alone and I couldn’t talk to anyone…and you weren’t there. I just missed you and wanted to talk to you so bad. I couldn’t even get a PHS number.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I missed you too,” Sephiroth whispered back, “I would start to ask you about different things and you wouldn’t be there. I’ve had scrambled eggs every day for a week because I pretended you were making them and then I’d have to eat alone.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “That’s even more sad and pathetic than me,” Cloud said. Sephiroth barked out one laugh, then let it dissolve into snickers. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I miss trying to cover up for you laughing like that all the time,” Cloud said, “I got all these weird looks because of it.” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I miss laughing,” Sephiroth said, “You’re the only person who can make me laugh without really trying.” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I miss my best friend,” Cloud said.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I’ve never had a best friend before,” Sephiroth said. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Neither have I,” Cloud confessed. They finally broke up their hug, Cloud wiping at his eyes that were a little redder and wetter than before. Sephiroth would be lying if he denied his weren’t the same. </span>
</p><hr/><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> Things changed quickly, especially Cloud. He was still stubborn as all hell. He just got better at directing it</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I want a pay raise,” Cloud informed President ShinRa, “I deserve it after all you put me through. I am blaming you. If you don’t, I gave Sephiroth that Leviathan summon. I really want to see if he can break the building in half with it…so I win either way.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> To his immense disappointment, Cloud got the pay raise. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> Then Cloud bullied his way into being Sephiroth’s Second in Command. He was still just a 2nd, but no one else really wanted to go toe to toe with him to take that spot. And Sephiroth seemed more than happy with it, despite being the one being bullied. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> Then Cloud pulled the riskiest move and called his mother and told her everything. She took it fairly well all in all. Sephiroth most of all. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “We couldn’t keep secrets, so I know a lot about you even though you’ve never met me,” Sephiroth said, “I…don’t know who my parents are so I might have pretended you were my parent for a month or so. I know that’s very inappropriate, but you are a very good mother. The kind I might have wished I had.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Do you have adoption papers?” Claudia Strife asked. It made Sephiroth blurt out his laugh and he started to recognize where Cloud got his sense of humor. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “I wish I did,” Sephiroth told her. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> But the biggest change came from Sephiroth. Just one afternoon after Cloud set down the latest set of reports he definitely skimmed through and summarized already. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “Cloud,” Sephiroth said, “I want you…I wonder if you would…come home with me?” Cloud never replied, but he also didn’t let go of Sephiroth for the rest of the evening so Sephiroth figured it was a yes. </span>
</p><hr/><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> Sephiroth’s PHS went off. He woke up. Someone else’s hand shot out and silenced the alarm. They yawned. Then Cloud crawled out of Sephiroth’s embrace, still stark naked. He paused and kissed Sephiroth’s forehead. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> “We’ve got a busy day,” Cloud growled out in his morning voice. Sephiroth heard it a lot, but had since decided he liked it better from another person and not in his head. He followed Cloud out of the sheets a minute later, because he could. By the time they got pants on Cloud was making eggs while Sephiroth made the coffee. Both humming the same little tune. They realized it, looked over and smiled. Then Sephiroth turned and started to make toast. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> It still hurt sometimes. Being close was still further away than in each others heads. But as Cloud unconsciously threaded his fingers with Sephiroth’s, Sephiroth decided there was much greater benefits to being alone together like this. </span>
</p>
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